Decades ago, my uncle was murdered on his way home from work. Being a devout Catholic family with one of my cousins a priest, I remember the delegation of Catholic priests in their priestly robes that turned up to condole with the family.

Then one of them stood to announce that because the deceased was known to have two other women outside his legal marriage contrary to the church’s teachings, there would be no requiem mass for him. I remember the long procession as the priests then exited the compound the same way they came in, without praying for us. 

Our cousin, a young just-ordained priest then, bravely stood and preached to his family, then led the burial procession. I was young and did not understand much of what was going on, but as I grew older, the bizarreness of the priests’ and church’s actions became clearer. How judgmental!

Several years later as a young university graduate, I returned to my village with a great aunt who had earned her PhD, for the family had put together a belated thanksgiving ceremony for us, where again many priests and two bishops were in attendance at my now-senior cousin-priest’s invitation.

I was a young, unwed mother, and when it was time for Holy Communion, I expressed my wish to be excluded, since according to the teachings of the Catholic church, I was not allowed to.

My dear cousin-priest told me to go ahead and take the Holy Communion, in order to ‘not look bad’. Now, those two incidents in my Catholic life in part influenced my departure from the Church to become a born-again Christian.

I will not mention the other cases, including friends, who were raising as their own, a child sired by a Catholic priest – a priest who possibly also determined who was prayed for upon death, and who was not worthy.

The Church refusing to pray for former Lubaga South MP Paul Kato Lubwama (RIP) triggered me greatly this week about these events and more.

So, this practice continues in this day and era, when we have witnessed requiem masses held for other ‘interesting’ deceased people?

Well, to each their own, but it is interesting when the measure of a man’s worth and holiness is determined by a fellow human being.

As a Pentecostal, however, I find praying for the dead a waste of time. We work out our salvation and divine destination when we are alive; once we expire, no amount of prayer and intercession will save our departed souls.

But prayers are important for the comfort of the bereaved family and friends.

Maybe the church should put in place a provision to pray for the grieving children and families of ‘undeserving’ dead Catholics, and use the painful period to draw them closer to God and their church. By Malita Wamala, The Observer.